Quotes by @WillyFerrell
Quotes 1-20 of 33
1 |2

Quotes by @WillyFerrell


Quote by @WillyFerrell

Tip to reduce weight: Turn your head to the left then turn to the right. Repeat this exercise every time you are offered something to eat.

Quote by @WillyFerrell

When someone says they have to ask you a question, you think of all the bad things you've done recently.

Quote by @WillyFerrell

I got 99 cookies cause a bitch ate one.

Quote by @WillyFerrell

Next time you feel a sneeze comnig on, yell out 'PIKA!' right before the sneeze.

Quote by @WillyFerrell

Rearrange these words: 1) PNEIS 2) HTIELR 3) NGGERI 4) BUTTSXE... Did you read: Spine, lither, ginger and subtext? Naughy Naughty.

Quote by @WillyFerrell

My Bed and I are deeply in love. It's obvious my Alarm Clock is jealous.

Quote by @WillyFerrell

If I had Morgan Freeman's voice I would sit in a corner and talk to myself for days.

Quote by @WillyFerrell

I guess wearing head phones and not speaking doesn't really signal 'Fuck Off' well enough to some people.

Quote by @WillyFerrell

I just saw that Harry Potter film. A bit unrealistic if you ask me. I mean, a ginger kid with two friends?

Quote by @WillyFerrell

I never let my children watch big band performances on TV. Too much sax and violins.

Quote by @WillyFerrell

I changed all my passwords to 'incorrect', So my computer just tells me when I forget.

Quote by @WillyFerrell

Dear life, When I said 'can my day get any worse' it was a theorical question not a challenge.

Quote by @WillyFerrell

I hate it when I forget to turn my swag off at night and I wake up covered in bitches...

Quote by @WillyFerrell

Who was the greatest prostitute in history? Ms. Pacman, for 25 cents that b*tch swallowed ball till she died.

Quote by @WillyFerrell

I want to have 3 kids and name them Ctrl, Alt and Delete. Then if they fuck up I wil just hit them all at once.

Quote by @WillyFerrell

x² y 8 [(x 2y ² = a-z] 2x ³ (- 2z = 2. 4) 10y - 5Z ³= k= 9. x...Yeah, I still cant remember one time this helped me in life.

Quote by @WillyFerrell

Immature: A word boring people use to describe fun people.

Quote by @WillyFerrell

I want to be rich enough to realize that I can’t buy happiness.

Quote by @WillyFerrell

The biggest lie I tell myself is, 'I don't need to write that down, I'll remember it.'

Quote by @WillyFerrell

Every girl deserves to be treated like a princess, except hoes.
Quotes 1-20 of 33
1 |2

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