Quotes by Sheldon Cooper (Big Bang Theory)
Quotes 1-20 of 32
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Quotes by Sheldon Cooper (Big Bang Theory)




Quote by Sheldon Cooper from The Big Bang Theory in Season 3 Episode 22 (Series quote)

This seat is ideally located both in relation to the heat source in the winter and a cross breeze in the summer. It also faces the television at a direct angle allowing me to immerse myself in entertainment or game play without being subjected to conversation. As a result, I've placed it in a state of eternal dibs.
2

Quote by Sheldon Cooper from The Big Bang Theory in Season 5 Episode 7 (Series quote)

'See you in hell Sheldon'? The most frightening thing about that is the missing comma!
9

Quote by Sheldon Cooper from The Big Bang Theory in Season 5 Episode 4 (Series quote)

Rajesh: 'I don't know if I want to play anymore.'
Sheldon: 'Because you don't have a girlfriend? Well, good Lord, if that becomes a reason not to play Dungeons & Dragons, this game's in serious trouble.'
6

Quote by Sheldon Cooper from The Big Bang Theory in Season 4 Episode 1 (Series quote)

Sheldon: 'I'm quite aware of the way humans usually reproduce, which is messy, unsanitary, and based on living next to you for three years, involves loud and unnecessary appeals to a deity.'
Penny: 'Oh God!'
Sheldon: 'Yes, exactly.'
10

Quote by Sheldon Cooper from The Big Bang Theory in Season 1 Episode 17 (Series quote)

Leonard: 'I don't think I can go out with her tonight.'
Sheldon: 'Then don't.'
Leonard: 'Other people would say, 'Why not?''
Sheldon: 'Other people might be interested.'
6

Quote by Sheldon Cooper from The Big Bang Theory in Season 1 Episode 17 (Series quote)

Penny: 'Leonard isn't the kind of guy I usually go out with.'
Sheldon: 'Leonard isn't the kind of guy anyone usually goes out with.'
4

Quote by Sheldon Cooper from The Big Bang Theory in Season 2 Episode 14 (Series quote)

My expenses account for 46.9% of my after-tax income. The rest is divvied up between a small savings account, this deceptive container of peanut brittle and the hollowed-out buttocks of a superhero action figure who shall remain nameless for his own protection... or HER own protection.
4

Quote by Sheldon Cooper from The Big Bang Theory in Season 2 Episode 5 (Series quote)

Leonard: 'Penny's taking you to the DMV, I'm going to bed.'
Sheldon: 'Why Penny?'
Leonard: 'Because rock breaks scissors.'
6

Quote by Sheldon Cooper from The Big Bang Theory in Season 1 Episode 15 (Series quote)

You tell people I'm a rocket scientist? My God! Why don't you just tell them that I'm a toll-taker at the Golden Gate Bridge?
3

Quote by Sheldon Cooper from The Big Bang Theory in Season 1 Episode 13 (Series quote)

Howard: 'Don't you think I should answer the engineering questions? I am an engineer.'
Sheldon: 'By that logic I should answer all the anthropology questions because I'm a mammal.'
6

Quote by Sheldon Cooper from The Big Bang Theory in Season 1 Episode 11 (Series quote)

Sheldon: 'Well, once, when I was 15, spending the summer at the Heidelberg Institute in Germany.'
Penny: 'Studying abroad?'
Sheldon: 'No. Visiting professor. Anyway, the local cuisine was a little more sausage-based than I'm used to. And the result was an internal Blitzkrieg, with my lower intestine playing the part of Czechoslovakia.'
6

Quote by Sheldon Cooper from The Big Bang Theory in Season 1 Episode 11 (Series quote)

Leonard: 'Sheldon, relax! She doesn't have any symptoms, I'm sure she's not contagious.'
Sheldon: 'Oh, please! If influenza was only contagious after symptoms appear, it would have died out thousands of years ago. Somewhere between tool using and cave painting, homo habilis would have figured out how to kill the guy with the runny nose.'
6

Quote by Sheldon Cooper from The Big Bang Theory in Season 1 Episode 10 (Series quote)

Penny: 'You'll never guess what just happened.'
Sheldon: 'I don't guess. As a scientist, I reach conclusions based on observation and experimentation. Although it occurs to me, you may have been employing a rhetorical device - rendering my response moot.'
6

Quote by Sheldon Cooper from The Big Bang Theory in Season 1 Episode 7 (Series quote)

She is cheating. No one can be that attractive and this skilled at a video game.

Quote by Sheldon Cooper from The Big Bang Theory in Season 1 Episode 6 (Series quote)

Sheldon: 'What are we doing here?'
Leonard: 'We're socializing, meeting new people.'
Sheldon: 'Telepathically?'
4

Quote by Sheldon Cooper from The Big Bang Theory in Season 1 Episode 2 (Series quote)

Oh, gravity, thou art a heartless bitch!
10

Quote by Sheldon Cooper from The Big Bang Theory (Series quote)

We dont need Wolowitz! Engineering is merely the slower younger brother of physics. Watch and learn! Do either of you know how to open the toolbox?
8

Quote by Sheldon Cooper from The Big Bang Theory in Season 2 Episode 8 (Series quote)

I'm sorry, but I'm not going to watch 'The Clone Wars' TV series, until I've seen 'The Clone Wars' movie. I prefer to let George Lucas disappoint me in the order he intended.
3

Quote by Sheldon Cooper from The Big Bang Theory in Season Season 2 Episode 2 (Series quote)

Leonard: 'I've dated plenty of women. There was Joyce Kim... Leslie Winkle...'
Sheldon: 'Notify the editors of the Oxford English Dictionary. The word 'plenty' has been redefined to mean 'two.''
15

Quote by Sheldon Cooper from The Big Bang Theory in Season 2 Episode 1 (Series quote)

Leonard: 'Sheldon, how could you just sit there and let them spy on me?'
Sheldon: 'They were clever, Leonard. They exploited my complete lack of interest in what you were doing.'
2
Quotes 1-20 of 32
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