Quotes from How I Met Your Mother (TV-series) (Page 2)
Quotes 21-40 of 444
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Quotes from How I Met Your Mother (TV-series)



How I Met Your Mother is a US tv-series. The quotes from the main characters Ted Mosby, Barney Stinson, Robin Scherbatsky, Lily Aldrin and Marshall Eriksen make the series legendary.

Right now, the ninth season of How I Met Your Mother is running on CBS.

Quote by Robin Scherbatsky from How I Met Your Mother in Season 9 Episode 4 (Series quote)

Lily: 'Just be yourself. Say something nice.'
Robin: 'Which one? I can't do both.'
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Quote by Barney Stinson from How I Met Your Mother in Season 9 Episode 4 (Series quote)

I'm also pleased to announce The Bro Code is now available in select airlines across the country. And Lufthansa. 'Der Bro Code' is, like, huge in Germany.
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Quote by Barney Stinson from How I Met Your Mother in Season 9 Episode 4 (Series quote)

This sacred text was eventually brought to the New World in 1776 by none other than Christopher Brolumbus. And that's why he got to bang Pocahontas.
1

Quote by Barney Stinson from How I Met Your Mother in Season 9 Episode 4 (Series quote)

The Bro Code has been around for centuries. Nay... whatever's more than centuries.

Quote by Robin Scherbatsky from How I Met Your Mother in Season 9 Episode 4 (Series quote)

My metabolism is all messed up. See, I can moose down a pint of fudge ripple for a midnight snack and wake up having lost weight. Well, everywhere except for my boobs. So annoying.
1

Quote by Barney Stinson from How I Met Your Mother in Season 9 Episode 4 (Series quote)

Ted: 'So, you are mad about me and Robin holding hands.'
Barney: 'Of course I'm mad Ted. Holding hands is like the fourth grade equivalent of banging. Well in your case, twelfth grade. Self-five!'

Quote by Barney Stinson from How I Met Your Mother in Season 9 Episode 3 (Series quote)

Robin: 'I can't believe my great grandparents still do that.'
Barney: 'And I never imagined a walker being used for anything other than walking.'

Quote by James Stinson from How I Met Your Mother in Season 9 Episode 3 (Series quote)

Barney: 'You avoiding the family too?'
James: 'I'm gay, I'm black and I'm getting a divorce. Those walking skeletons are gonna have more questions for me than their pharmacists.'

Quote by Ted Mosby from How I Met Your Mother in Season 9 Episode 2 (Series quote)

Here's the thing, kids: When you believe in people, people come through.

Quote by Marshall Eriksen from How I Met Your Mother in Season 9 Episode 2 (Series quote)

I'm from Minnesota, where there's plenty hot-dogs for everyone. Perhaps even too many...

Quote by Barney Stinson from How I Met Your Mother in Season 9 Episode 1 (Series quote)

Barney: 'Our wedding is gonna be legendary.'
Robin: 'No wait for it?'
Barney: 'I've got you, I don't have to wait for it anymore.'

Quote by Barney Stinson from How I Met Your Mother in Season 8 Episode 21 (Series quote)

Lily Aldrin: 'Guys, The Captain just made me a very interesting offer.'
Barney Stinson: 'Finally we get around to the real reason he hired you. Just promise you film it, and please use a tripod. There's nothing artistic about shaky-cam, it just looks sloppy.'
2

Quote by Marshall Eriksen from How I Met Your Mother in Season 8 Episode 23 (Series quote)

Lily: 'Okay, stop! Every time he lands, that chair farts out ten-year-old Dorito dust.'
Marshall: 'Yeah, it's the chair...'

Quote by Barney Stinson from How I Met Your Mother in Season 8 Episode 23 (Series quote)

Look, if Michael Jordan's healthy, you don't let Scottie Pippen run the offense. Oh, you're from Canada, right. If Wayne Gretzky's healthy, you don't let François... what I'm saying is: hockey is stupid and I'm point guy!
2

Quote by Marshall Eriksen from How I Met Your Mother in Season 8 Episode 23 (Series quote)

Italy doesn't need something that is wrinkled, red and leaky, and smells like booze and narcotics. They've already got former Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi.

Quote by Lily Aldrin from How I Met Your Mother in Season 8 Episode 24 (Series quote)

So, what do you want to do tonight? Drink ourselves blind, set a car on fire? Oh, watch a movie that doesn't start with a desk lamp jumping on top of a capital 'I'?
1

Quote by Ted Mosby from How I Met Your Mother in Season 8 Episode 21 (Series quote)

You know how sometimes you'll meet a girl and there'll be that one bewitching little detail that'll make you fall in love with her instantly? You know, a little freckle on the nose, the lilt of her laugh, the way she pronounces a certain word or phrase...

Quote by Barney Stinson from How I Met Your Mother in Season 8 Episode 18 (Series quote)

Underneath all of those lies is one true thing. One true thing that can support the weight of all the lies in the world, and that's the fact that I love you.

Quote by Barney Stinson from How I Met Your Mother in Season 8 Episode 18 (Series quote)

Barney: 'Ted what is my one rule?'
Ted: 'You can tell how old a girl is by her elbows?'
Barney: 'My other one rule.'
Ted: 'Flax seed relieves upset stomach?'
Barney: 'My other one rule.'
Ted: 'Always have a fake pair of concert tickets in your pocket in case Lily invites you to something stupid?'
Barney: 'My other one rule.'
Ted: 'Labanese girls sprint to third base and then stay there.'
Barney: 'My other one rule.'
Ted: 'New is always better?'
Barney: 'New is always better!'
7

Quote by Barney Stinson from How I Met Your Mother in Season 8 Episode 6 (Series quote)

Every time I go after a busty dullard who can't tell time or thinks I'm the ghost of Leonardo DiCaprio, I'm shallow. But somehow it's okay for Robin to date a guy who can't be trusted around outlets.
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Quotes 21-40 of 444
1| 2 |3|4|5|6| .. | 23

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